AUX Cable: The Musical

[Masøn M.]

That is genius!!

[DScott]

It is nothing short of that.

[Jeff Ross]

I give credit to God for the genius of the parody, but moreso for the greater genius that is Lyle the Kindly Viking…

I’m definitely appreciating the script-writing in that show more now than I did back when it first released.

[Jeff Ross]

In honor of Episode 043’s release, here is a parody of the song “We Are Family” by Sister Sledge, which was referenced in the episode:

We are family,
I got all my F.A.C.E.s with me!
We are family,
Get up ev’rybody and sing!
We are family,
I got all my F.A.C.E.s with me!
We are family,
Get up ev’rybody and sing!
Ev’ryone can see we’re together
As we walk on by,
(Hey) and we fly just like Birds of a feather
Tweeting in the sky.
(ALL!) all of the people around us they say,
“Can they be that close?”
Just let me state for the record:
We’re giving love in a family dose!
We are family,
I got all my F.A.C.E.s with me!
We are family,
Get up ev’rybody and sing!
We are family,
I got all my F.A.C.E.s with me!
We are family,
Get up ev’rybody and sing!
Living life is fun and we’ve just begun
To get our share of puns, jokes, and rhymes
(HIGH!) high hopes we have for the future
And the stock of Tyme.
(WE!) no we don’t live depressed
‘Cause we follow the Golden Rule:
Have faith in God and love others too!
You won’t go wrong, oh no,
Using this power tool!
We are family,
I got all my F.A.C.E.s with me!
We are family,
Get up ev’rybody and sing!
We are family,
I got all my F.A.C.E.s with me!
We are family,
Get up ev’rybody and sing!
[repeat chorus as it fades out]

[Masøn M.]

You beat me to it… HO-… But really this makes me really happy…

[Jeff Ross]

I thought you were setting me up for parodying “Happy” by Pharrell Williams, but I don’t think those lyrics need changing. They fit almost perfectly with the #NotEatTheColdFries episode as written. xD

You’re welcome to give it a try if you think otherwise, though…

[DScott]

This can be the finale when we actually make this a thing.

[Ryan Matlock]

I think that Lyle the Kindly Viking parody may be my favorite one yet. I can’t stop singing it, and that right there is my childhood musical. #Nostalgia

[Jeff Ross]

Dawnkeschön, Ryan! Lyle the Kindly Viking is the musical of my childhood as well. It was fun to revisit it while attempting to write the parody. 😀

[Jeff Ross]

#41628

[Jeff Ross]

In the most recent F.A.C.E. Skype call, Joshua requested a parody of the VeggieTales silly song “Oh, Where Is My Hairbrush” entitled “Oh, Where Is The Aux Cable”. This is my attempt to fulfill that request. I did my best to mirror the original, but I did end up adding a few extra syllables into the parody.

Narrator: “And now it’s time for silly songs with Kristen,
The part of the show where Kristen comes out and sings a silly song.
Our curtain opens as Kristen, having just finished her morning scroll, is searching for her podcast.
Having no success, Kristen cries out:”
Kristen: “Oh, where’s the Aux Cable?
Oh where’s the Aux Cable?
Oh, where, oh, where, oh, where, oh, where, oh, where, oh, where, oh, where, oh where oh, where…
Is the Aux Cable?”
Narrator: “Having heard her cry, Dawn Glanz enters the scene.
Shocked and slightly embarrassed at the sight of Kristen wearing headphones, Dawn regains her composure and reports:” Dawn: “I think I saw the podcast online!”
Kristen: “Online’s the Aux Cable.
Online’s the Aux Cable.
Online, Online, oh, fine, online, oh, fine, oh, fine, online, online, online…
Is the Aux Cable!”
Narrator: “Having heard her joyous proclamation, Josiah the Carrot Stick enters the scene.
Shocked and slightly embarrassed at the sight of Kristen wearing headphones, Josiah regains his composure and comments:”
Josiah: “Why do you need a podcast? You don’t have any time!”
Narrator: “Kristen is taken aback; The thought had never occurred to her.
No time? What will this mean?
What will become of her?
What will become of her podcast?
Kristen wonders:”
Kristen: “No time for my podcast.
No time for my podcast.
No time, no time, not fine, no time, no time, no time, not fine, online, no time…
For my podcast!”
Narrator: “Having heard her wonderings, Awkward Potato enters the scene.
Shocked and slightly embarrassed at the sight of Kristen wearing headphones, AP regains her composure and confesses:”
AP: “Kristen, that fun podcast of yours…
Well, you never hear it, you don’t really need it, so, well, I’m sorry; I didn’t know.
But I gave it to the P.U.N. – ’cause he has time!”
Narrator: “Feeling a deep sense of loss, Kristen stumbles back and laments:”
Kristen: “Not fair! Oh, my podcast.
Not fair! My poor podcast.
Not fair, not fair, nightmare, not fair, nowhere, nightmare, not fair, not fair, not fair!
My little podcast!”
Narrator: “Having heard her lament, Joshua enters the scene.
Himself wearing headphones, both Kristen and Joshua are shocked and slightly embarrassed at the sight of…each other.
But recognizing Kristen’s generosity, the P.U.N. is thankful:”
Joshua: “Thanks for the podcast.”
Narrator: “Yes, good has been done here.
The P.U.N. exits the scene.
Kristen smiles, but, still feeling an emotional attachment for the podcast, calls out:”
Kristen: “Take care of the Aux Cable.
Take care, oh the Aux Cable.
Take care, take care, don’t dare not care, take care, nice hair, no fair, take care, take care…
Of the Aux Cable.”
Narrator: “The end!”
rousing ovation

[Jeff Ross]

(I posted the parody, and then I thought I ought to try to format it better, only to have the edited version not post; I ended up having to put my original formatting, plus add an extra line into the intro before the parody would post and not be withheld as a “duplicate post”.)

[Joshua S.]

I love it ??

[Masøn M.]

Hil-hair-ious…

[Awkward Potato]

Yes yes yes this is beautiful

[Jeff Ross]

The last time we F.A.C.E.s had a Skype call, Masøn, Brooke, Bekah, and I stayed up after the call and chatted in the group chat. Masøn had killed a scorpion in his room earlier that evening and was wide awake, hoping that no more stinging creatures would appear while he attempted to sleep. Inspired by the situation (that seemed reminiscent of a civil war), Bekah drew plans for protecting Masøn from the scorpions, Masøn started writing scorpion-related Hamilton parodies, and Brooke maintained conversation while doodling. (I wrote a play-by-play of the scenario in Masøn’s bedroom, but otherwise just appreciated all of the creativity that was oozing during that late night discussion.)

Toward the conclusion of the discussion, I got the idea to write a parody of it based upon TobyMac’s song “Start Somewhere”. Telling Masøn that he would get to read a parody when he awoke helped him to go to sleep. Good news: Masøn was able to sleep, and he didn’t die from a scorpion attack. 😀

The parody is told from hypothetical Masøn’s point of view, as he struggled with his decision to go to sleep rather than stay up and write more scorpion-related Hamilton parodies. I finished a draft of the parody before morning and posted it to the group chat. While it was okay, I have since made some revisions before posting it here. Enjoy.

Start Somewhere Parody
Last night, everything was movin’ so fast;
I could barely keep track,
Oh, of my Hamilton or your good drawin’s
In hindsight, I woulda, coulda, shoulda not gone there
But left without a word to spare…
Was it your compliments or just my restlessness?
That’s got me thinkin’ that I’m never gonna get it right.
I wanna straighten this before the sun goes down tonight.
If I could only write the parodies I feel inside…
This thing is eatin’ me alive.
Well I’m right here,
And you’re right there,
And God knows I’ve got to start somewhere
‘Cause I’m Masøn,
And you’re Brooke-n,
And those parodies are Hamilton.
Well, I’m right here,
And you’re right there,
And God knows I’ve got to start somewhere
‘Cause I’m workin’,
And you’re lookin’,
And those scorpions, those scorpions are still lurkin’.
[music]
I’m tossin’ and turnin’ on the things I’d undo
As I wrestle with the painful truth…
Oh, my sleep escapes me as guilt berates me.
Exhausted, the memories of drawings so dear:
I can see them like a world premiere…
When did my perspective lose all respective stress?
That’s got me thinkin’ that I’m never gonna get it right.
I wanna straighten this before the sun goes down tonight.
If I could only write the parodies I feel inside…
This thing is eatin’ me alive.
THIS THING IS EATIN’ ME ALIVE!
Well I’m right here,
And you’re right there,
And God knows I’ve got to start somewhere
‘Cause I’m talkin’,
And you’re list’nin’,
And those parodies are Hamilton.
If I sleep now, no parody.
How can I turn my back and just get sleep?
When I’m right here, and it’s right there,
And God knows I’ve got to start somewhere.
“Scorpions…” as I lay in bed,
“Oh, if I could, I’d make ’em dead!”
If I could turn my words around,
No palindrome is found…
But here I am, and there you are,
The parody’s close, it’s not so far.
I’m reaching out for my smart phone
Before the fading sun; Forgive me that I’m not done.
Hey, hey
Hey, hey
Hey, hey
Hey, hey
Well I’m right here,
And you’re right there,
And God knows I’ve got to start somewhere
‘Cause I’m postin’,
And you’re noticin’,
And those parodies are Hamilton!
If I sleep now, no parody;
How can I turn my back and just get sleep?
When I’m right here, and it’s right there,
And God knows I’ve got to start somewhere!
[music]
Dude, the scorpion’s gotta go, man. That’s it.
I mean, enough is enough.

[Jeff Ross]

I was re-reading this thread, and I realized that there were several TØP parodies, but there was a certain popular song of theirs that was missing. Therefore, in honor of Ryan’s upcoming wedding, here is a parody of “Stressed Out”, written hypothetically from Ryan’s point of view. Enjoy.

Hold Out:
I wish I found some better puns no one’s ever heard
I wish I had some better poise that balanced Matthew Bird’s
I wish I found some sounds on my soundboard that sound cool
I wish I edited so quick I could stick to the schedule

I was told when I got older, freedom would be mine
But now my life’s busy and I feel the F.A.C.E.s mind

My name’s Ryan. F.A.C.E.s, I care what you think
My name’s Ryan. F.A.C.E.s, I care what you think

Wish I could turn back time, to the good Wednesdays
When the F.A.C.E.s wai-ted to sleep until it came out
Wish I could turn back time, to the good old days
When the Aux Cable would release but now just hold out

Just hold out

Sometimes a certain sound will take me back to an episode
Somehow I’m never able to pinpoint the exact Aux Cable show
I’d take sharp angles out of it if I ever found it
Try to sell it, never sell out of it, I’d then make it free for download

The F.A.C.E.s are my fans, ’cause everybody nose
They’ve blown me away, bestowing notes, jokes, and their own shows
But they pierce my mind’s inside of why this awl matters
Out of stooping low and climbing high, we all should take the ladder

My name’s Ryan. F.A.C.E.s, I care what you think
My name’s Ryan. F.A.C.E.s, I care what you think

Wish I could turn back time, to the good Wednesdays
When the F.A.C.E.s wai-ted to sleep until it came out
Wish I could turn back time, to the good old days
When the Aux Cable would release but now just hold out

We used to play pretend, give each other different names
We would make a commercial and then we’d show it on Wednesday
Used to meme about my pace but now they’re screaming in my face
Saying, “Wake up, you need to get married”
Yeah

We used to play pretend, give each other different names
We would make a commercial and then we’d show it on Wednesday
Used to meme about my pace but now they’re screaming in my face
Saying, “Wake up, you need to get married”
Yeah

Wish I could turn back time, to the good Wednesdays
When the F.A.C.E.s wai-ted to sleep until it came out
Wish I could turn back time, to the good old days
When the Aux Cable would release but now just hold out

Used to play pretend, used to play pretend, varied
We used to play pretend, wake up, time to get married
Used to play pretend, used to play pretend, varied
We used to play pretend, wake up, time to get married
We used to play pretend, give each other different names
We would make a commercial and then we’d show it on Wednesday
Used to meme about my pace but now they’re screaming in my face
Saying, “Wake up, you need to get married”
Yeah

[Jeff Ross]

Since we’re waiting on TØP to release new music today, I made another TØP parody. It’s an attempt to tell the hypothetical story of Ryan just wanting to get through his wedding day so that he can get to sleep, but he can’t because people are still at his reception eating cake and making puns. I know we’ve already done a parody for “Guns for Hands”, but it was a Star Wars parody, so I figured it would be okay if I re-used the song for this parody.

Puns for Hands

I know what you think of your weapon (wea-pun)
When the sun shines at the dawn
And shows what you have done
I know where your mind has gone
And you’re caring ‘bout my marriage
How I will never be wed again
I know, I know oh ow, what that means, I know oh oh oh ow

That you all have puns
And you never see the cake’s piece gone
And you all have hands,
To take it, to take it, don’t take it, take it, take it

I’m trying, I’m trying to sleep
I’m trying, I’m trying to sleep
But I can’t, but I can’t when you all have
Puns for hands yeah

I’m trying, I’m trying to sleep
I’m trying, I’m trying to sleep
But I can’t, but I can’t when you all have
Puns for hands yeah

Let’s take this a second at a time
Let’s make this hand short, a thin line
Together, let’s eat
Together, to the beat
But there’s hope out the window
‘Cause that’s where wind blows
Let’s go outside and all lift hands
But until then you’ll never understand

That you all have puns
And you never see the cake’s piece gone
And you all have hands,
To take it, to take it, don’t take it, take it, take it

I’m trying, I’m trying to sleep
I’m trying, I’m trying to sleep
But I can’t, but I can’t when you all have
Puns for hands yeah

You’ve turned your hands to puns, trade in your thumbs for acquisition
I must forewarn you, of my disorder, or my condition
‘Cause when the sun sets, it upsets what’s left of my invested interest
Interested in wanting to linger, rest instead
The solution is, I see a whole room of these hungry kids
Food at each wrist, I simply tell them they should chew on this
Quickly index the rest of this pun-fused music, it’s
Obviously best for them to get their puns from A-list

I’m trying, I’m trying to sleep
I’m trying, I’m trying to sleep
But I can’t, but I can’t when you all have
Puns for hands

I’m trying, I’m trying to sleep
I’m trying, I’m trying to sleep
But I can’t, but I can’t when you all have
Puns for hands

[Joshua S.]

God is bigger than the stalker man parody
Jeff and Franklin after phasing through Joshua’s ceiling, burst into song to comfort him about stalkers

Jeff: You were surfing on the web….. You were feeling kind of sleepy
You just could not close your eyes because YouTube was getting creepy…..

Franklin: Was that Kristen in closet?!
Is that Josiah in the hall?!

Jeff: There’s is someone big and scary casting shadows on the wall….
Now your phone is ringing like drum
Your skin is getting clammy
There’s a hundred tiny cameras placed right inside your pantry!!!!!!

What are you going to do? Jeff asks

I’m going to call the police Josh replies

Jeff: No, you don’t need to do anything.

What why?! Josh exclaims.

Jeff: Because………………
God is bigger than the stalker man
He’s bigger than stalk cams
and the man in his 40s
Oh God is bigger than the stalker man
And He’s watching out for you and me…..

[Jeff Ross]

I think that scenario only works if Joshua has given out his coordinates to Franklin and/or Jeff…otherwise the notion of bursting in on someone to comfort him on stalkers seems like it would require some stalker skills to complete, making the message a bit less comforting.

That being said, I found the parody quite entertaining.

[Joshua S.]

That was kind of my whole point to make it sound creepy. I’m glad you enjoyed it

[Jeff Ross]

I wanted to write a “Pet Cheetah” parody for Masøn…and this is what I came up with. I tried to keep the “song-writing” theme, altering it slightly to a “parody-writing” theme. There’s only one extra syllable I had to add, but I think it makes for a better parody:

Young Giraffe

I am still wide-awake, no one to confide.
Four time zones, for the F.A.C.E.s who do reside
In North America, yet I do remind
You that when I am nocturnal, they are not online.

No, I won’t go. I want to write rhymes.
I’ll sit here till I find my answer.

There is a young giraffe janitor in T.O.P.H.A.T.
Undismayed, well behaved, his name is Masøn
M., and he hastens to make parodies,
Now the young giraffe’s quicker to be reposing than to make these.
I will compose and get going,
I’m showing the F.A.C.E.s in just enough places,
I’m done with tip-toeing.
I’ll stay in my room,
Allowed to go out where the others are lurking but soon
I shall find sleep, I bet.
This poem from my mind’s best
Will let Masøn know that he’s growing.
This clique means so much to this dude,
It could make him aware of his music,
And be raised from death to let loose it.

No, I won’t go. I want to write rhymes.
I’ll sit here till I find my answer.

I feel parodies start to flow in my mind,
So I’ll take this moment most are dozing to transcribe.

Young giraffe. Giraffe.

No more song about giraffe.
Needs another paragraph.
Audience is sleeping and snoring
While I laugh, while I laugh, while I laugh
While I laugh, while I laugh. XD
I want more on this track.
Yeah, that’d be… that’d be good.

[Jeff Ross]

I just realized that the line “raised from death” is supposed to be “raised from rest”…I started with the original lyrics and then I wrote the parody on top of it, so it seems I neglected to change that one word. Sorry about that.

[Jeff Ross]

Hmm…now I’m wondering whether I should’ve used “lyrics” instead of “answer” in the parody…oh, well. Maybe next time I’ll wait a day after writing a parody so I can double-check after I sleep for mistakes and improvements. Maybe I’m taking this tube seriously…

[Jeff Ross]

Below is a parody of The Hype by TØP, written from the perspective of hypothetical Ryan Matlock. (I wrote this a while back and tinkered with it yesterday. Since Ryan decided to release a video about patrons today, and patrons were mentioned in the parody, I’ve decided to go ahead and release this. I struggled with how to approach the second line of the chorus, which is why it changes each time the chorus is repeated.)

Sometimes I am told I am patronized
My entire fan base needs to galvanize
I’ve got to stand fast or I’ll blow away
I’ll record my podcast so the patrons pay

Nice to know my kind will be on my side
I don’t quite see the hype
But I find you’re a beautiful sight
And you’ll be just fine
Just don’t you leave the Skype

Yeah, they might be talkin’ inside your head
Whether you’re getting up or going to bed
It might take cool friends to get through the freeze
But you will get plugged in eventually

Nice to know my kind will be on my side
I hope you keep polite
Plus I find you’re a beautiful sight
And you’ll be just fine
Just don’t you leave the Skype

No, I don’t know when we’re releasing
But you can hear when it comes out
No, I don’t know when we’re releasing
But you can hear when it comes out
No, I don’t know when we’re releasing
But you can hear when it comes out
No, I don’t know when we’re releasing
But you can hear when it comes out
But you can hear when it comes out

Nice to know my kind will be on my side
(I’m so relieved that’s right)
Plus I find you’re a beautiful sight
And you’ll be just fine
Just don’t you leave the Skype

Nice to know my kind will be on my side
We’ll quote some scenes, all right
Plus I find you’re a beautiful sight
And you’ll be just fine
Just don’t you leave the Skype

Nice to know my kind will be on my side
I’ll post when reason rhymes
And I know you’re holding on so tight
But you’ll be just fine
Just don’t you leave the Skype

[P.U.N]

You know speedy, and snotty, and lucky, and faster, fastest, and slowest, and coolest, and dumby, but do you recall the largest taun taun of all… Pudgy the hothien taun taun had a ton of weight, and it you ever saw him, you would even say ” how many chocolate bars have you ate “. All of the other taun taun used to laugh and call him names, they wouldn’t let poor pudgy forget about all his gains. Then one frosty Christmas eve Solo came to say “you smell bad on the outside, Hey! you’re big enough for Luke’s coat tonight. Then all the taun taun chuckled as they shouted out with glee, pudgy the hothien taun taun, great kid do not get cocky

[P.U.N]

This is a parody of Rudolph the red nose reindeer, for those who see this randomly without context

[Jeff Ross]

I would’ve put that parody in a different thread (linked below), but since there are other Star Wars parodies in this one, it’s fine.

Parodies that aren't necessarily relating to the Aux Cable

[P.U.N]

On yeah ?

[Awkward Potato]

#10199 there’s stuff on it now 😀

[Author]

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