Jeff RossMousetrap
Jeff RossWe conclude this fantastical tale with an important message:
“Wow, what a confusing story! Good thing I have a tool that helps me keep everything straight. Hi, I’m Ryan Matlock, and if you’re unsure about what happened in this or any other adventure you’ve ever encountered, just have a visit to the Clarification Station. This patented piece of technology works even better than the Infatuation Station, if you can believe it. Just download the ‘Clarification Station’ app to your phone, put in your request, and receive all the clarity you could ever want within 30 minutes or less. Our patented technology takes machine learning to the extreme, as the Clarification Station Google searches the topic at hand, compiles all relevant facts, contexts, & inside jokes relating to the search, and cobbles them together into a simple, succinct narrative for you and your whole family to understand and enjoy.
How much does this cost? Peanuts compared to the physical and mental strain you would endure from trying to figure everything out yourself. The app is completely free to download, and each search costs less than your favorite 1 lb cup of Kopi Luwak coffee. Plus if you download the app today and enter the promo code ‘LETLANGOLIERSLANGUISH’, you can get 16% off your second search. This is a limited time offer, though, so you’ll have to act quickly. Isn’t it time for you to enjoy some relaxation station instead of dealing with frustration station? Submit your questions to the Clarification Station right now!””
Announcer: Go to your favorite app store and download the Clarification Station app today! We are not responsible for any delays caused by a poor internet connection, which is required for using this app.
“So what did you think of the story, Matthew Bird?”
“Well, Ryan, it became way more complex than I anticipated at the beginning. I think I’m going to have to download the Clarification Station app to make sure I understand it all before the sequel releases!”
Here concludes this fantastical tale.
(That’s right, this whole story premise was started by Matthew Bird so he could rake in the dough as primary spokesperson for the Clarification Station app. There’s a plot twist you didn’t see coming. 😀 )
Jeff RossPidgin
Jeff RossTail
Jeff Ross(I just wanted to quickly interject and say that Bohemian Rhapsody is popular in part because of how unique and revolutionary it was for its time. You’re right, Josiah, to wonder why it would be popular today, as it would not be very well known if it had been released just this year. However, due to the greater contexts surrounding the song’s release, including the difficulty to produce music in the pre-digital era [it was well before the days of auto-tune], helped its popularity to blossom. It’s still beloved today partly because of the emotional response it elicited upon its release and partly because its uniqueness in some ways still holds up. Many view it as a piece of art rather than a piece of music. The song reached number 1 when released in 1976 and again when it was re-released in 1991 (a full 15 years later), not to mention to music video was praised excessively for being one of the first full-length music videos produced, about a half-decade before MTV became a TV station.
I only heard the full r-e-c-o-r-d-i-n-g of the song this year, but I remember classmates of mine in gradeschool singing the song at the lunch table because it was a fun challenge for them to memorize the lyrics [it was before the days of high-speed internet, so Bohemian Rhapsody was the silly, fun song of choice for my classmates]. The song is over 40 years old, but it doesn’t sound that old, because it was so ahead of its time.
Hopefully my brief attempt to explain some of the logic behind the song’s popularity is helpful. Music can become really messy when some people evaluate it based upon sheer substance and others appreciate it as artwork, including more that just face-value characteristics.)
Jeff RossWell, if you look at Halloween as dressing up instead of just spooky things, I think that Troy Woollybear could work. A “Wollybear” is a type of caterpillar. But it is tough to come up with anything scarier than “rise of the kumquat” when it comes to your name.
Jeff RossAye
Jeff RossEveryone
Jeff RossCars
Jeff Ross(I counted “convenient” as four syllables instead of three; different dialects pronounce it differently.)
Jeff RossGuffaw
Jeff Ross‘Tis better to be
Convenient in this case
Than to not “haiku”
Jeff RossDessert
Jeff RossI’m with this guy, and I really don’t think zombies are what we should be concerned about:
Jeff RossFranklin, I thought that was a Frankenstein line, not a zombie apocalypse line.
Jeff RossOut
Jeff RossPersonally, I can think of so many benefits to only showing up for the last song at a dance. #CountYourBlessings
Jeff Ross“This was a very interesting thread. I will not let it die! Let’s bring back the discussions, people. Also, I’ve never been on a missions trip.”-Awkward Potato, May 19, 2017 at 1:54am Eastern Time, almost five months ago.
Well, I suppose I could contribute to this conversation by saying that I’ve never been on a missions trip myself, but I have contributed financially to a few. I think it would be fun to go on a missions trip sometime, but so far, I’ve been able to do more to make a positive impact for God’s Kingdom here at my home church than I could on a short-term missions trip.
Jeff RossIf someone were to make a movie about Mephibosheth, would it be a lame new movie or a new lame movie?
Jeff RossAmen, sister!
Jeff RossI think that whatever you end up doing will turn out well, Rebekah, since your goal is not to make yourself famous; rather it is to do your best with what you have to glorify God and develop your skills & abilities for doing so. It reminds me of Ephesians 5:19-20 and Colossians 3:16-17, which are verses for us to follow even when we aren’t making YouTube videos. 😀
Jeff RossNo, not in the least. Confidence on the part of a content creator is key for a YouTube video to be enjoyable to a viewer. This is especially beneficial for the style of music covers that you’ve been doing, Rebekah, since that confidence helps your voice to project to the microphone and your smile to beam across to the camera. Keep up the good work! 😀
Jeff RossIt is interesting to see how a stranger can post a single comment on the Not-Forum and stimulate a discussion that lasts for three days before everyone realizes that the stranger isn’t participating. I guess that’s the consequence of having a friendly and active forum. xD
Jeff RossHow mysterious…
Jeff RossPerhaps there’s a way to dump all of the data into a computer program that could generate the statistics for you. That might make it possible to catch up, if it’s something you really want to do. There’s probably a way to do it in Excel if nothing else.
Jeff RossJeff RossI feel a lot better now, partly because I now know which microphone it was.
Jeff RossThank you for that clarification, Masøn!
Jeff RossBlau
Jeff RossPardon me for my confusion:
“Throwing shade” is a concept that I still do not fully grasp, being from a slightly older generation. I try not to be demeaning or derogatory; instead I try to edify and instruct to improve others. Sometimes people take that as “showing someone up”, but that’s not my intent. I am still unsure whether labeling things like “mic drops” and “sick burns” make a correction easier to receive or more distracting from the substance of the message, simply because I’m not from a culture that handles or discusses conflict that way.
To be clear: my intent was not to make Josiah look bad, but to help him know that there’s more to helping people than pointing out mistakes. Timeliness, appropriateness, and importance all factor into the equation.
If you’re saying that I sullied the good name of Josiah the Carrot Stick, please forgive me. If you’re saying that I said what needed to be said in an excellent and appropriate manner, then I accept the compliment. If the microphone wasn’t a Sennheiser, let me know what it actually was.
