016: An Episode TUBE Remember

016: An Episode TUBE Remember

We’re up to sixteen now! Join us as we rip off the Inner Tube and discuss what the official moniker should be for Aux Cable fans!

Listen all the way through for our regularly scheduled bloopers! Also be sure to join the conversation using #WaterCatchEmAll.

Be sure to contact us with your questions!


Special thanks toΒ Gabe MillerΒ for our intro and outro music.

Corncob Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License


    1. Congrats, Carrot. (Lemme know if you would like me to stop calling you carrot, I don’t wanna offend anyone…other than ryan)

        1. Also, you probably won’t offend me unless (hypothetically) you use a bad word or make fun of the Legend of Zelda.

          1. I don’t say bad words, so you are safe there.
            And legend of zelda is the best thing ever! Why would I bad mouth it??

          2. Some people don’t like it (for some inexplicable reason). I probably wouldn’t be so obsessed if I hadn’t played Ocarina of Time when I was five…

          3. Same here. NOBODY could tell I was a Zelda fan if I listed my top five video games, though (it’s a secret to everybody):
            Ocarina of Time
            Skyward Sword
            Twilight Princess
            Wind Waker
            Minish Cap

          4. See, what got me hooked on zelda, was back when I was like…5 we had the old game boy. Not even the advance. And we had a zelda game for it. I absolutely loved it!!
            My top 5 favorite video games are probably:
            Mortal Kombat XL
            All of the zelda games
            Donkey Kong for the gameboy (I wish I still had my gameboy)

          5. Link’s Awakening? Unfortunately that’s one of the eleven I haven’t played πŸ™ Also, if we’re including video game series in our top five lists as opposed to just specific games, then my top five is:
            Legend of Zelda
            Mario Kart
            Super Smash Bros. (series)
            Battle for Wesnoth
            Super Mario (Galaxy is my favorite)

            Honorable Mention:

          6. As soon as I buy a laptop, I am gonna play portal, it’s on my list…
            Have you play unfair Mario yet? I’m boss at it! Although, it’s funny for those watching me play it.

          7. Best game ever right??
            I have to wait until I get a laptop to play it more often, but it’s so much fun…to watch others play it.

          8. Well then, I must ask… Since you like Portal and Mario, have you played Mari0… When Mario has a portal gun, fun things happen…

          9. Intriguing… has anybody played Legend of Zelda: The Lampshade of No Real Significance?

          10. Also add the Battle for Wesnoth. It’s free (and fun), and should be out on Steam sometime this year

          11. Ok, when I get said laptop (later this year, but before I start online college), y’all will have to remind me of all this.

  1. Since height came up, how tall are you guys? I’m going to guess Ryan is 5’9″, and Matthew is 6’0″

        1. (Either that, or my trying to guess your height was creepy. Sorry. [insert embarrassed emoji])

    1. I would’ve guessed the same thing. And if that’s accurate, yay I’m taller than ryan!!! And boo, I’m shorter than Matthew πŸ™

      1. Yeah… I’m shorter than both, but by less than half an inch if I’m standing up straight (which is rare). Give me six months (or less), and I’m pretty sure I’ll be noticeably taller than Ryan.

        1. I just gotta make sure to wear heels when I meet them…I like being tall and using people as arm rests…

          1. My older sister still uses me as an arm rest sometimes… and I’m two inches taller now.

          2. I am almost 6 foot, so I tower over everyone. And the few people that I don’t tower over, they are still arm rests.
            I don’t care if you are 6 foot 4, I will try to use you as an arm rest!

      1. Wait, there’s a different Mason here? Or is there something else significant about it being the same one? πŸ˜€

          1. “I’m so offended, super offended, always offended by you!”
            -Adler Davidson

        1. I don’t think anybody here would actually take your comments offensively. Personally, I find your comments witty and funny.
          Plus Olivia deals with me everyday…and I can be a handful.

  2. it HAS to be Auxen. Auxen is the best. it’s a freaking PUN! what could be better? actually I know what’s better, Auxy morons lol

    1. Yeah, I think Auxen is probably our best option as far as elegance goes. (despite the fact that I was the one that came up with ACEs and FACEs)

          1. (Is it interesting to listen to? I am extremely picky about what I listen to and watch)

          2. (Yeah, it’s pretty interesting and entertaining. Obviously everybody has different tastes, though. Also, I need to be careful about what I say, since people in this comment section are on it :D)

          3. (Not a problem. I freaked out a little bit when Ryan responded to a comment I made on Episode 014.)

          4. (Whenever they mention me, I smile like an idiot…they can’t read what’s in parentheses right?) (This podcast has become what I look forward to every week)

          5. (Same… even though they’ve only mentioned me two or three times. Oh, well I’ve only made my presence known recently, so…)

          6. (I’m going to have to ask several more decent questions, first, though. Or at least ones they’ll answer. Probably sending about nine questions at once wasn’t a great idea, especially since only threeish were advice.)

          7. (See, I’m really bad. I have come up with a way of writing the questions, so that way it tricks the human mind into wanting to answer them, and I also know what kind of things they like to talk about, and what would make the episode extra amazing (potato noises), and then I send in 4-6 unrelated questions, that way one is bound to be picked, and I can dominate the world)

          8. (Eventually, though, someone else will become the biggest fan, and you’ll be like “I used to rule the world, seas would rise when I gave the word…” So basically, I should send in a question that includes a string of puns, and it will get answered because Ryan loves puns.)

          9. (I’ve tried that a few times, they haven’t been read on the show…but by all means, try to take the title from me)
            (Also, I haven’t seen Ryan’s gma or Dawn comment in quite some time…which is weird)

          10. (They probably saw all the other comments, and decided not to bother.)

        1. I can’t function without it either, so I slept in…and then rushed to get ready for work.
          I need to learn to adult.

  3. I like auxen, but…I would love to be referred to as:
    *dramatic music*
    Kristen. The FACE. The myth. The legend.

    1. I think it would be funny if we used both to some extent, simply so this could happen:
      Ryan: “Okay, we’ve got some great questions from our Auxen this week. Do you know who this question is from, Matthew?”
      Matthew: “Nope. Who?”
      Ryan: “Your FACE!!!!!”

  4. A Series of Unfortunate Events is the best thing!! Olaf has been my role model since I was little, I got the VFD symbol tattooed on my ankle…everyone needs to go watch it on netflix.

        1. Yeah, context can be an issue with punnery sometimes… I guess it just comes with practice.

  5. A little late commenting, but I really like all the name options! Although Auxymorons is my favorite.

    1. Better late than never, Amber! πŸ˜‰ I think “auxymorons” is definitely the funniest option! ?

    1. It used to show a generic “mystery person” picture for people who don’t have avatars when they comment. But now it shows little monsters instead! That way you can more easily tell the difference between people when reading through all of the comments. Cool, eh? πŸ˜‰

      1. I like it a lot!! It just freaked me out, because I was scrolling through the comments and it changed right before my eyes!
        (I literally fell on the floor because you said “eh”…so Canadian!!!)

        1. Also, the pictures for Kristen and Olivia look like pieces of toast with brains on top.

          1. I am brown toast brain monster…have you met my friend, purple toast brain monster?

          2. Lol, I thought something got hacked or something… I feel better now… But seriously, what in the world am I!?!

          3. Erm. A red angel blob with robotic arms, several legs, and tusks?

  6. I didn’t know there were comments! I’m horrible… Also signed up for WordPress so I can have an Avatar

  7. Would it be weird if every week I commented a ranking of who had commented the most times in the previous episode, and the top five commenters of all time? I started keeping track anyway, so…

  8. Here’s this week’s Top Commenter Stats!

    Weekly Champion (Episode 015):
    Josiah the Carrot Stick (63 comments)

    All-time Rankings (Through Episode 015):
    1. Kristen (71 comments)
    2. Josiah the Carrot Stick (65 comments)
    3. Mason M (20 comments)
    4. Dawn (13 comments)
    5. Rex Stauss (9 comments)

          1. I’m content with 3rd… See, 3rd always gets overlooked so when you two crash the website I won’t get blamed πŸ˜‰

          2. *Kristen always blames Ryan. I think it’s an honor to have crashed a website.

          3. …I would consider it an honor, but if they get angry…it’s Ryans fault somehow.

          4. Do you really think it’s likely that those two will get very angry at us?

          5. No, they wouldn’t actually get angry (because they love us), but they might jokingly get angry.

  9. I think if they got angry, it’d be like the Baskin Robbins scene from Ant-Man… They think that it’s super awesome, what we did, but they still have to fire us (in this case, ban us) from the website…

        1. Yeah, that would probably be most effective. I doubt Kristen would stop, though. πŸ˜€

          1. As we’ve already established, everybody here is broke… granted Matthew and Ryan would be the ones that would need to pay you.

          2. They should make that a goal on patreon!! If they get $40 a month, I comment less…I would take 10% of all proceeds.

      1. Scratch that, nobody’s commented in like six hours, so more like two and a half days, now, and we still haven’t made it to 150.

      1. Well, we could try to revive it… maybe it’s just mostly dead. Sooo… how’s your day been, Mason?

        1. Well, my day has been eventful, I suppose… My Taekwondo instructor decided it was leg day, so now I can barely walk… And I have a lot of school to do, so there’s that… But yeah, how has your day been?

          1. Umm… pretty decent… aside for stupid Molgera, that is. (Zelda boss)

  10. Any of yall personally know any hairless cat breeders? (Sphynx, elf, any breed)
    I want one, so I can name it baldamort. And call it baldy, and my mom just approved of the purr-chase if I clean my room, pay for its food, vet bills, etc, and I don’t know how much I trust random websites.

    1. Nope, sorry. Plus, I probably don’t live anywhere near you, so even if I did, it probably wouldn’t be helpful. Also, Baldamort is an excellent name. Wouldn’t Baldemort be slightly more accurate, though?

      1. Autocorrect does whatever it wants. Yes I meant Baldemort. And I would pay to have the cat flown to me, or to travel to get the cat. I really want the cat!! They are so ugly it’s cute! Plus I won’t have allergies to it

          1. Carrot, as my favorite author says, “If you are allergic to a thing, it’s best not to put that thing in your mouth, particularly if that thing is a cat” (I say even though in a few days I will eat something I’m allergic to)

            Mason, exactly!!!! Why not have that in bed with you at night!! They are super soft, for being hairless. My neighbor has like 2.

          2. He’s an awesome guy. (He, being Daniel handler aka lemony snicket, the author of a series of unfortunate events)

          3. Dang it. Meant to say (but forgot): [in Smash Bros. announcer voice] “NEW RECORD!”

          4. Umm… I could mention your accomplishment in next week’s stats?

          5. Naw, I was joking. Although, I feel like I will be bumped down to 2nd. Also, each week I think I’m gonna comment an inspirational quote or something.

  11. No, Mason! Hairless cats are adorable, and the ones I’ve met are super sweet and they are very soft!

    1. I’m going to stay out of this conversation so as not to embroil myself in controversy. πŸ˜€

      1. Probably, but where I’m currently living you can’t have kids (baby goats, not children). Stupid city folk’s rules.

          1. Sorry, I just cat to make that pun. You must be feeling hair-ried by all these dumb jokes. But I don’t carrot.

          2. Smh…not gonna admit how hard I laughed at that.
            And I want pygmy goats!! So I can put them in sweaters…I’m gonna put the cat in a sweater too

          3. Umm… do animals actually like getting put in sweaters? (I wouldn’t know, since I’ve never had any pets)

          4. I have had…a ton of dogs, and they love it!! If we could’ve found a way to put clothes on our hedgehog we had, she would’ve loved it too I’m sure lol

  12. I vote Auxen! Since the show thrives on questions, the fans are the ones who (cattle) drive the show! (Sorry to join in on the comments so late!)

    1. With a pun as good as that, you can join whenever you want. Welcome to the comments!

  13. Not trying to start a war, I also know that not everyone watches football.
    But superbowl is Sunday, who do you think will win?
    As a Patriots fan, I hope they win. (If you have Tom Brady jokes, go ahead and say them. They are hilarious)

    1. GO PATS. I literally know nothing about the Falcons, so I can’t really make an educated guess. However, fivethirtyeight says that the Patriots have a 61% chance of winning.

      1. Granted, fivethirtyeight also gave President Trump an 11% chance of losing the popular vote and still winning the Electoral College. Stats aren’t everything.

        1. Well, we have Edelman…right? He’s not injured is he? I don’t keep up with injuries like I should.

    2. I don’t have a Tom Brady joke, but I have a Cowboys joke…

      Did you hear that Tony Romo can’t get into his house? Yeah, someone painted an end zone in his yard and he just can’t seem to get in…

      I think the commercials are gonna win, too… I don’t like football, only watch superbowl for the commercials! πŸ˜€

      1. Last year the commercials were terrible, hopefully that’s not the case this year. And that joke!! I started choking on a cookie!! My dad is a cowboys fan, so I have to tell him that!!

      2. I enjoy watching football, but I’m not a super avid fan or anything, I prefer baseball. I mostly check and see if the Patriots won or not… I agree on last year’s commercials being sub-par. The Ridgeline sheep ad, the Prius4 ad, and the Hyundai Kevin Hart ad were all pretty funny, though. Also, that’s a pretty good joke…

        1. See, I can’t watch baseball. Like, I understand everything about it, but if I’m a the field, I feel like I’m gonna die. And I haven’t ever watched it on tv.

          1. Often radio announcers are actually better than TV announcers… I enjoy going to games, especially since there’s a minor league team not super far from where I live. They also have entertaining promotions between innings, which helps if someone doesn’t find baseball itself super interesting. Everybody has their own opinion, though. Also, if you understand everything about baseball, explain the infield fly rule. πŸ˜€

          2. By everything, I mean that I can watch it and understand where they are getting the numbers and know when to cheer and when to boo.
            There is a minor team right near me too, but they are terrible

          3. I absolutely cannot watch baseball on TV, it’s too slow for me, but I do enjoy going to a minor league game every once in a while. That only sport I really like to watch is hockey… And I’m not even Canadian…

          4. Hockey is the best!!! Ever since I was little, I have loved it (Stingrays!!!!), because they can beat each other up and it’s cool!!

          5. Bruins. (even though I pay literally no attention to hockey, except for occasionally a little bit during the Stanley Cup) I played an NHL2K Xbox360 game at a friends house once, and that was pretty fun. I don’t mind watching hockey, I just never do…

          6. Dude, you have to. It’s intense. Screaming fans, bloody fight right before your eyes. It’s beautiful.

          7. I’m over exaggerating the violence by a little, it depends on which teams are playing.

          8. Going to hockey games is something you have to experience. I recommend going to an AHL (Which is the minor league) game, just because usually there’s not a single bad seat, and it’s a cheaper, and it’s just a little more fun in my opinion, but yeah. For a lot of people, it’s actually going to a game that gets them hooked on it. It doesn’t even matter if you know all the rules or not! It’s just fun to watch!

  14. Folks… With this comment right here, we will be 5 comments away from 200. Can we do it!?! (Without spamming :P)

  15. …I just realized the episode comes out tomorrow, and I haven’t sent in any questions this week. I may not be mentioned on this episode!! ?? (jk I’m not sad)

  16. 200!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      1. I think your excitement made it go all stupid. *makes mental note to never get that excited while commenting because I don’t wanna be blamed*


    1. Seriously, I heard the intro to this podcast and was like “wait what? WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN!?!” And now I’m sentence to reading through old comments and trying to catch up :/

      I’m not sure if that’s possible…

        1. Well, obviously you’re here now, so you didn’t miss QUITE everything! Episode 017 is scheduled for a release tomorrow, so I’m sure you’ll have plenty of chances to be prevalent in the next comment section. But you’re right it was kinda “blowin’ up so fast.”

  18. I like the term “auxens”, but I also love the ACES and FACES. Auxcaliber, once completed (My brother doesn’t realize but we are definitely naming the sword that) concurs that I am one of the FACES and will….how shall we say this…strongly disagree with whomever says otherwise.

      1. I wouldn’t say we’re blowing up the INTERNET…that’s a little too big. We’re causing another kerfuffle on the Aux Cable Show.

        SPEAKING OF WHICH. Tomorrow we must cause a bigger kerfuffle (which we shall call the “bother”), so that I may become a part of it because the emails never notified me of the extreme event occurring D:

          1. Am i? Is this like the illuminati? Should I ask my mom if it’s OK for me to join?

          2. I would assume you’re in… at least if you capitalize your “I”s when reffering to yourself in the future πŸ˜€

          3. Shoot. Let me edit that. “At least if you capitalize your β€œI”s in the future when referring to yourself.”

          4. Why would i need to do that. Its not like i care. And if u care thats not my fault i dont

            (That hurt a lil)

          5. … and I should have said ‘I’s. Oh, well. Someday I’ll learn to proofread properly.

          6. Sorry. No hurting intended, meant as a joke. Note that I also corrected my grammar.

          7. Gotcha. Also, feel free to correct my grammar whenever you like… and while we’re at it, I meant hurtfulness (if that’s a word).

          8. Can I be in the society too? I’ve only left 3 comments so far (weak, I know), but trust me, that will change!

          9. I don’t see why not, Brooke Air Conditioner… we should start a podcast called the “Blowing Up the Internet Fancast” or the Auxen Fancast, or the ACEs Fancast or whatever.

  19. @26:19 Pearls of wisdom right there Ryan. That’s why I’ve never had a boyfriend…(except one when I was three XD Does that count?)

    1. I wouldn’t think so… but I’m a homeschooled pastor’s kid, so what do I know?

      1. I have seen a lot of homeschooled, pastors kids make terrible decisions. Totally unsheltered. I have learned not to stereotype pastors kids as good.
        (Personally I think my innocence and such is amazing, but I also signed a purity contract at the age of 12) (not a pastors kid, I just have great parents)

          1. You are different, I have been able to be a terrible influence on you πŸ˜‰ (pauly shore, the conjuring, hairless cats)

        1. Stereotypes are rarely a good thing, especially when assuming whether someone is a good Christian person or not, but we homeschooled pastor’s kids I think are at least slightly more likely not to have been in a relationship before or whatevs. I personally have never seen the point of being in a relationship before age 17, and none of my siblings officially dated before the age of 20 (unless something happened that I don’t know about).

          1. I have never seen the purpose of dating before age 18, and I have seen interesting pastors kids.

          2. Don’t get me wrong, I have always been friends with different Pastor’s kids. I have also seen…weird ones…maybe cuz of the weird church I went to at the time.

          3. I’ve gone to the same church my whole life, so I haven’t really come into contact personally/been friends with that many pastor’s kids. Also, 17 was a semi-arbitrary age, I think in most circumstances I would agree with you on 18, I was just giving a bare minimum.

          4. I have lost count to how many churches I’ve been to.
            And personally, I’m OK with others dating at 16, 17, whatever, as long as they are mature and doing it for the right reasons (to find a spouse, as opposed to free food)

          5. Also, I’ve been to other churches before, I just haven’t attended them regularly.

      2. (Now, I do watch bloody, scary, sometimes demonic, gore movies. But my family sees no issue with that. It’s stuff that has bad parts, inappropriate jokes, etc that I can’t watch, and have no interest in anyways)

      1. That is the question. The Aux Cable Instagram implies that it is… or at least Ryan was editing it.

          1. Watch, the episode is gonna come out at 11:59 PM and I’m gonna have to stay up and listen to it…

          2. I don’t have social media… all of the Aux Cable pages are public.

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