THE BUTTERFLY APOCALYPSE

THE BUTTERFLY APOCALYPSE

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  • #7642
    AvatarDawn
    Guest

    I paced back and forth. Ryan and Matthew had suggested a butterfly apocalypse. A butterfly apocalypse would ensure that Aaron Tveit and I would be together forever. No one else would be able to take him away. They had discussed the idea of zombie butterflies, but that seemed..too difficult to contain. It would hardly be fitting if I died from the butterflies of my own creation. No, the butterflies would have to carry something easily preventable…

    I replayed the episode again. And again. And again. When Ryan got to the part of dust on the butterfly, something clicked.

    Dust. Airborne dust, easily stopped by a gas mask. I would capture butterflies and coat them in a toxin. After a brief google search, I settled on Botulinal Toxins, which kills when 1/1000000000 of a gram is inhaled. Best part? Easily derived from an anerobic bacteria. Much easier, and less well known than anthrax. No one would suspect what was happening. Until they are all dead. No one will get between Aaron and I.

    So it began. I have spent the last six months capturing butterflies and deriving the botulinal toxins. I sent a gas mask to the Tveit residence. Hopefully he’ll understand what it’s for. Tomorrow, the butterfly apocalypse will begin.

    I looked into the mirror as I brushed my teeth. Eyes filled with determination stared into my own; my steely gaze unsettled me. “You aren’t wavering now,” I told myself. “We’ll be happy…right?” Shaking aside my doubts, I set my gas mask on my face. Then, I descended to the basement. My beautiful butterflies fluttered to and fro in their little cages, oblivious to their deadly purpose. I turned on the machine. And the butterflies became the world’s end.

    I set them free. Now it is time to wait.

    #7646
    AvatarPoulet Frit
    Guest

    I LOVE IT!!!!!!

    #7647
    AvatarPoulet Frit
    Guest

    Aaron is bae!!!!!! (I don’t use that word irl)

    #7648
    AvatarDawn
    Guest

    Did you know that butterflies have a habit of not crossing oceans? And not being very fast? This whole thing is ridiculous! Not one person has fallen ill, because the blasted bacteria are anaerobic, which means when exposed to air/oxygen…THEY DIE!

    Ryan and Matthew, I blame you. Come up with a better and more containable way for the butterfly apocalypse to occur. This has been an absolute failure. And Aaron and I are no closer than before…

    Oh, try THAT for a conversation starter! “oh yea, I tried to murder the world so we could be together.” “Umm….what?” “Never mind, you don’t need to know.” *awkward laugh*

    #7650
    AvatarPoulet Frit
    Guest

    Yesss!!! Knowing me that would totally actually happen!!

    #7653
    AvatarOlive
    Guest

    Hahahahahah this is hilarious! Love it!

    #7668
    AvatarJosiah the Carrot Stick
    Guest

    Wow. I could NEVER guess that Dawn is going to be a biology major.

    #7672
    AvatarPoulet Frit
    Guest

    Haha

    #7676
    AvatarJosiah the Carrot Stick
    Guest

    I thought she was going to be an autotune major… wait, that’s me.

    #7712
    AvatarMasøn M.
    Participant

    Did my stupid question inspire a fan fic?… I can die peacefully now…

    #7713
    AvatarJosiah the Carrot Stick
    Guest

    MASOOOOOOOOOON!

    #7758
    AvatarBrooke AC
    Guest

    BROOKE LIKE THIS.

    #7759
    AvatarBrooke AC
    Guest

    *LIKES

    #7760
    AvatarPoulet Frit
    Guest

    It’s BROOOOOOOOKKKEEE

    #7763
    AvatarJosiah the Carrot Stick
    Guest

    BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKE

    #7773
    AvatarBrooke AC
    Guest

    HELLO, FRIENDS. I SHALL RETURN TOMORROW.

    #7793
    Avatarsuperchris01
    Participant

    This was awesome! ROFL

    #7795
    AvatarBrooke AC
    Guest

    IT’S CHRISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS(TIANNNNNNN -Kevin McCreary)

    #7797
    AvatarPoulet Frit
    Guest

    YESS!!!! brooke just made me choke on air!!

    #7798
    AvatarBrooke AC
    Guest

    Hahaha, don’t choke, Kristen!!!!

    #7805
    AvatarJosiah the Carrot Stick
    Guest

    Heh.

    #33853
    AvatarBrooke AC
    Guest

    You know the rules

    #34365
    AvatarJosiah the Carrot Stick
    Guest

    Told me

    #39955
    AvatarBekah
    Guest

    Hey could someone give me a full rundown of this butterfly apocalypse I never really understood it,

    #39965
    AvatarMasøn M.
    Participant

    My first question I ever sent into the podcast asked what to do in the event of a butterfly apocalypse. That’s basically it lol.

    #39969
    AvatarDawn
    Guest

    And then Ryan and Matthew had suggested the Butterfly Apocalypse as a solution to another thing.

    #42195
    AvatarMilk Monster
    Participant

    milk

    #42287
    AvatarJeff Ross
    Participant

    It’s spoiled.

    #45305
    AvatarAwkward Potato
    Participant

    I might end up writing a short story for a class based on the butterfly apocalypse.

    #45308
    AvatarJeff Ross
    Participant

    I’m not coming up with a good butterfly-related pun to respond with, and that bugs me… but it’s neat that you might be able to transform an Aux Cable reference into a story for school.

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