Once Upon a Time, Part 1

[Awkward Potato]

(Oh, okay. Ignore my comment.)

[Masøn M.]

(What I had written, where I called Link Zelda, was what you interpreted it as, Potato, but I don’t know if Dawn is implying what Carrot said or not… Like I said, it’s all kinda confusing lol)

[Awkward Potato]

(Gotcha. I think. This really is hurting my brain lol. I have a part I’m about to add, so please don’t post anything.)

[Awkward Potato]

Back at the shop, Peter was just finishing explaining the situation to his brother.
“…And after the bunny was gone, we found your shop.”
“Interesting.”
“Yeah, it’s been crazy.”
“If you say so.”
“I do say so.”
“Ok, now what?” Dawn interjected. Everyone was finished with their drinks and starting to stand up.
“Let’s take a stroll, shall we?” suggested Manalive. “Also, where is the other member of your party?”
The group looked around and simultaneously realized that Triste hadn’t come back.
“How can a bathroom break take this long?” Mason wondered.
Suddenly Triste came around the corner, nearly slamming into a wall. “Oh, hi guys,” she said, panting a little. “Miss me?”
It looked to Peter like Triste was hiding something. He didn’t want to make a big deal of it though, so he kept quiet. No one else seemed suspicious, at any rate. No, scratch that. Manalive was beginning to shake and twitch as he stared at Triste.
“Oh no,” groaned Dawn. “Not again!”

[Josiah the Carrot Stick]

(I intend to make my theory accurate, whether or not it is already. Can everybody hold things to the shop until this afternoon? I have some entertaining ideas.)

[Poulet Frit]

(Catching up on this was amazing!!)

[Josiah the Carrot Stick]

(*rubs hands excitedly* Just you wait. I have plans.)

[Poulet Frit]

(*excited squealing*)

[Josiah the Carrot Stick]

(Wicked long post coming soon…)

[Poulet Frit]

(*more excited squealing*)

[Josiah the Carrot Stick]

“TEST THEN RISK DEEL,” Manalive crowed.
“Deel isn’t a word,” Peter interjected.
“Actually, a deel is an item of traditional clothing commonly worn since centuries ago among the Mongols and other nomadic tribes of Central Asia, including various Turkic peoples, and can be made from cotton, silk, wool, or brocade,” said Josiah, “…at least according to Wikipedia.”
“…okay then.”
“Anyway, shall we sally forth? I think we should visit the Princess; she’s going to know the best how we get out of here. We may also wish to stop by Lon Lon Ranch on the way and find ourselves some mounts.”
“Mounts? As in horses?” Dawn said excitedly.
“Indeed.”
“Yay!!! I love horses! I ride horses!”
“Ah, lovely. That will be useful, since I know virtually nothing about riding them. Shall we be off then?”
“Yes, let’s.”

So they set off. Hyrule was a beautiful land, full of lush green grass, and having not a cloud in the sky. The only odd thing was that there was music emanating seemingly from the world itself. It wasn’t terribly far from Lake Hylia to Lon Lon, and they made it there in good time. They were greeted by a young red-headed girl named Malon, who found mounts for all but Josiah. Malon quickly apologized for the lack of horses, but Josiah waved her off. He then proceeded to whistle a pattern 3 notes, doing it twice. Suddenly, the landscape picked up the song, and finished it. Then, a brown horse with a white mane galloped straight to Josiah, who mounted.

“…how… how did you do that?” wondered Malon and Dawn, both amazed.
“Oh, just a little trick I picked up in my youth.”
“…okay.”

The posse warmly thanked Malon for her help, and headed towards Hyrule Castle Town. They triumphantly rode through the gates, and found themselves in the midst of a busy market.
“GETCHA HOT SPRING WATER HERE,” a large rock yelled directly in Mason’s ear.
“GAAAAAAAA WHAT IS THAT THING???” Mason said, shocked. ” I thought there was a boulder there, and then that… beast sprang up!”
“I’m a Goron, bud,” said the “beast,” a bit miffed.
“…oh. Er… sorry…” replied the still daunted Mason.
“Whatever, dude.”

They continued on through the town, and up to the gates of the castle.
“Who are you and what do you want?” said the guards.
“We seek and audience with the princess,” said Josiah respectfully, “We have stumbled into this land, and are searching for a way out. I am Josiah the Critical, and these are my companions, Peter, Manalive, Triste, Dawn, and Mason.”
“Well, alright. I suppose we can let you in.”
“Thank you. For each of you, here is a coupon to the Living Fellow. It’s the teashop in the old Lakeside Laboratory.”
“Oy, thanks mate!”
“You are most welcome.”

So they entered the castle. They dismounted their horses, and left them in the stables under the care of the grooms. They proceeded to the main hall, and waited for the Princess to enter. She was not long. She looked fetching in a lovely pink dress, with superbly embroidered designs, including the family crest.
“Welcome,” Zelda said, “how may I be of service to you?”
“Thank you for your audience, your majesty. We have stumbled accidentally upon your land, and seek a way to the Hub,” Josiah said respectfully.
“I see. Many come with a request like yours, and OH MY GOODNESS IS THAT A PERRY THE PLATYPUS PIN?”
“Er, yes,” Dawn said.
“THAT’S SO COOL!!!!!!!!!”
“Thank you?”
“I LOVE Phineas and Ferb! And I collect pins! Where did you get that?”
“I found it at a Goodwill on Terra.”
“That’s amazing! I need to go there sometime!”
“Hang on one moment,” said Josiah, “how do you, Hylian nobility, know about a TV show from Terra?”
“Oh… I uh… some travelers introduced me to it.”
“Oh?”
“Er… yes!”
“I don’t think so. In fact, I’m not sure that you’re even Princess Zelda.”
“What? I-is this treason?”
“No, it is not, BROOKE.”
“B-brooke? Who is Brooke, you rude young man?”
“You know perfectly well, AC.”
“I’m not- she’s not- you can’t- how?” Brooke said miserably, flinging off her crown. “Was I that bad?”
“No, you weren’t. In fact your ruse was quite deceiving. However, your sudden exclamation about Phineas and Ferb gave things away.”
“…I tried so hard…”
“But why? What had you to gain from this? You can’t have come up with this yourself, you must have been influenced by another. But who would wish to interfere with us? Who would wish us ill? Who would ask you to impersonate royalty? Who would use you as a tool to get their way? Who would you trust enough to let them do so?” Josiah paused for dramatic effect. “Who, but W.B. MASON?”
“…what?” said a very confused Mason.
“Not you, I meant- oh, never mind. Anyway, I was saying… there can only be one who could do this. You’ve fallen into league with the Eldest. You’ve met with a terrible fate, haven’t you?”
“I… I…”
Josiah turned to Triste. “…and what do you have to say for yourself, Eldest?”
“What? What are you talking about? Who is the eldest?” Triste said nervously.
“Oh, you know well enough. Every since Manalive’s first outburst, I’ve known. You could only hid for just so long. GUARDS! Seize her!”
Three guards rushed in, and headed for Triste.
“Fools. You have only foiled me this time. Next time, and there will be a next time, you will not be so lucky.”
With that, she vanished. The guards collided, and then lay scattered on the floor. Brooke burst into tears and crumpled, caught by Manalive just in time.
“I-I’m so sorry…” she said between sobs, “…she-she found me, and befriended me, and I trusted her… oh, why did I trust her?”
“It’s alright, Brooke. You didn’t know,” Dawn said, glowing a warm yellow, “we’re here now. You can come with us, and together we can stop her.”
“Yes, yes, we must… oh, what have I done?”
“The best of us would have fallen, Brooke,” said Josiah, “She’s far too cunning and deceptive. We must put the past behind us, and continue on. But now we know what we’re up against. We must journey to the other worlds, collecting resources and allies, and only then can we face the Eldest, and defeat her once and for all. Come. Let’s go.”
“I’m hungry. Anybody want some meatloaf?” Peter said.

[Josiah the Carrot Stick]

(So that wasn’t even the longest post in the thread. But it had some nice development, if I do say so myself.)

[Poulet Frit]

(THIS IS SO BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!)

[Josiah the Carrot Stick]

(*bows* Thanks. It took me a while.)

[Poulet Frit]

(If I could hug the story rn, I would. All the LoZ stuff. All the evil cunningness of Kristen) (am I really this cunning? I don’t think I am. That’s probably a good thing. I dig being evil though)

[Josiah the Carrot Stick]

[Yeah, I tried to throw in some nice tidbits here and there. Also the super random things to change the pace a little and add comic relief (i.e. Who but W.B. Mason and the comment about meatloaf.)]

[Poulet Frit]

(I love the comic relief stuff. And whenever Peter and manalive bicker it’s like…spot on perfection!! The story line is headed in a beautiful direction. I feel bad for what I did to brooke and I didn’t even do it!!)

[Josiah the Carrot Stick]

(Yeah, I didn’t feel like it would work to make Brooke legitimately evil, so I thought that would work decently as an alternative, though it definitely made you a lot more cruel. :/)

[Josiah the Carrot Stick]

(I really proud of how I weaved in the Happy Mask Salesman quote.)

[Poulet Frit]

(Brooke is unable to be evil. Ever. She’s too amazingly fantastic. I can be cruel irl especially while playing games and such) (if we ever play manhunt, and I get found, I’ll sell you out if I know where you are)

[Josiah the Carrot Stick]

(Whoops, I should have said I’m. Indeed. I can be somewhat cruel during games, too.)

[Dawn]

(Augh I was going to do a thing where people from the game can’t recognize people outside it which is why Link phased through Josiah, so I guess we’ll have to figure out something else for why Link phased through…)

[Josiah the Carrot Stick]

(Probably because he’s a pot-smashing wacko.)

[Josiah the Carrot Stick]

RIP this thread.

[Masøn M.]

(Just a brief hiatus is all… Kinda like the podcast… Hopefully…)

[Poulet Frit]

(People gotta think)

[Josiah the Carrot Stick]

(Hmm… well I posted last, so I can’t do anything.)

[Dawn]

(I’m working on a big thing right now but I don’t have time atm.

[Josiah the Carrot Stick]

(Cool.)

[Jeff Ross]

(I just realized that Josiah’s comment of “RIP this thread” wasn’t in parentheses.)

[Author]

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