We do not in fact have a secretary of defense. The current list of positions in TOPHAT (as according to this thread) is as follows:
Poulet Frit- President
Masøn M.- Attorney General (also janitor of the year at some point)
Josiah the Carrot Stick- Chairman of the Board
Brooke AC- Secretary of State
Explosive Yeast- Strange Guy who Stands Creepily in the Corner Eating a Pickle on a Stick
Awkward Potato- Official Hug Dealer
Dawn- (pending) Secretary of Defense and Holder of Horses
(I’m pretty sure I got everyone)
